me and my boys

The results are in...

2012-02-14T14:04:00.002-06:00

This little foolio of mine has sleep apnea. "Mild" sleep apnea they called it, but still, the child does not sleep like he should. I actually started crying when she told me. There's a reason! A REASON!!! Some common symptoms of childhood sleep apnea--daytime hyperactivity (check), moodiness (check), irritability (yes, go on...), etc. We go see the pediatric ENT again on Thursday to hear what she thinks we should do. I'm guessing surgery to remove his tonsils and adenoids (which I hear is brutal). We've tried Flonase, but nothing much has changed. This gives me hope that things can change and improve.

My Valentine's Day poem, from Seth

2012-02-14T12:08:00.003-06:00

I Remember

If you feel a bit ploughed under

Ground all day by little boys

If you sometimes sigh and wonder

What became of former joys

Close your eyes and picture this

Sunlight gleams on waving corn

Part your lips now for the kiss

Heady summer love reborn

I remember who you are

I have not forgotten

You're the comely cookie jar

This thief's hand was caught in

Sleep Study

2012-02-07T11:45:00.003-06:00

Brice's sleep study took place last week. I knew what an ordeal this might be for him, so I made sure to really prep him and get him super excited--you and me! staying in a hotel together! you're going to look like a superhero! it's going to be so awesome!! And he bit--he was telling his teacher about it, complete strangers got to hear what he was about to do. So on Thursday night, we packed a bag--complete with his favorite smelly blanket and blue bunny--and headed to the pediatric sleep study center.

The room was so much "nicer" than I expected. We really were in what appeared to be a hotel room. There were monkeys on the wall and an IKEA leaf canopy over my bed :) The pediatric nurse was super nice and showed Brice all the wires and he even got to watch Nick Jr. while she hooked him up.

He really champed it and didn't fuss to much. I think he was just fascinated with it all. The sleep part wasn't great. He cried and whimpered and had a hard time. The nurse told him she could see him on the camera and hear him if he cried out, and Brice took full advantage of it.

"Diana?" "yes Brice?" "Wanna hear me count to 900?"

"Diana?" "yes Brice?" "are you nocturnal?"

In the morning, which in Brice's world was 4:40am, they unhooked him and let us get cleaned up. The nurse wasn't allowed to give me any kind of indication of his sleep quality, so we'll have to wait a couple weeks. I can't really capture how TIRED we both were. I am amazed I didn't crash the car on the way home. And poor Brice fell asleep at 4pm the next day, and proceeded to sleep 14 HOURS. Which really puts a dent in my whole "Brice doesn't sleep well" theory.

February 16th is the follow-up with the dr., so we'll know more then.

A new Etsy shop, by another "Danielle Suzanne.."

2012-01-29T15:37:00.001-06:00

My good friend's Etsy Shop! Check it out!

http://www.etsy.com/shop/danielleCrillyArt?ref=seller_info

Sleep

2012-01-24T11:25:00.001-06:00

Brice is not a good sleeper. It has not always been like this. He started sleeping through the night at 3 weeks. By 3 months, he was up to 11 hours. As he's gotten older, his sleep has gotten progressively worse. As has his behavior--no big surprise there.

First he was getting up closer to 7, then 6am. Now, we force him to stay in his bed until 6am, because (apparently) he gets up long before then. We have found him watching TV in the basement at 3am. Sometimes he'll get up in the morning and tell us he got up at 3, then 4, then 5. And we believe him. He always has dark circles under his eyes. ALWAYS. And he's just so tired all the time. He yawns, he's irritable, he melts down with the slightest provocation. Some of this is his personality. He's intense and emotional. But we just knew that sleep must play a big part in this.

We've tried everything we could think of--melatonin, Benadryl, warm milk. Putting him to bed early, later, blackout curtains. You name it. We had him tested for allergies. Cut out gluten and dairy. Nothing worked. I was googling "black circles under eyes" and saw a common thread--adenoids. So I made an appt. with his pediatrician. Tonsils and adenoids were fine. DANG!!! But on a hunch, I made an appt. with a pediatric ENT. We went today. She stuck a long scope up his nose and lo and behold...his adenoids are HUGE. As are his tonsils. How did the pediatrician miss this? I don't know.

But apparently he has 90% blockage in his adenoids. So, when he turns 5 in three weeks (knock me over with a feather--FIVE--how did this happen??) we will do a sleep study where they hook up his head and monitor his sleep to see what's really going on. But this is good news. GREAT NEWS. There is a reason! He might start sleeping well and long. No more black circles! We told him this at our celebratory Starbucks stop and do you know what he said?

"Will this help me be good?"

Oh, Brice. Sweet Brice. It's a start, at least :)

Where we've been...

2011-12-06T12:58:00.001-06:00

The boys discover how to climb on the outside of the staircase.

The boys carve a pumpkin with "papa" in his workroom. Notice my father's steady hand while Harry literally hangs on him.

Brice is psyched. Harry has zero interest in wearing his Thomas "costume." We told him, "no costume, no candy." He kept the front piece on, but tossed the hat as soon as he hit the sidewalk.

We told them, "eat as much as you want."--thinking they would tap out at 5 pieces. They did not. It took us about a week to recover from the 14,000 pieces of candy they ate that night. Live and learn...

Scully. He's huge. He is already ten pounds over the predicted weight. Good thing he's fluffy.

Brice wore his costume for 5 days in a row. Harry is in his favorite costume, as well. See how many leaves we had? We have a huge gingko tree in our backyard. Seth insisted on doing it old-school, even though I desperately wanted a leaf blower.

This is Brice and Ariella. She is Seth's cousin's daughter. She is so lovely and fun. They came over for Thanksgiving and Brice held her hand the whole weekend (and ate her Cheerios snacks; Harry swiped her babydoll).

Decorating our tree. This is the first year (in seven!!) we've had a proper Christmas tree (various, boring reasons...). And it's real--also a first for me. The kids LOVED decorating it. Of course, there were about 40 ornaments on the bottom.

The boys were beside themselves with joy. Good thing i'm not TypeA, because it was pure chaos.

Harry brushes his teeth before passing out. Such a big boy. He's even potty training now. He has figured out how to go in small increments, thus maximizing the number of M&Ms he gets. They think they're gaming me; I think they're wonderful.

Fall Cookies!

2011-10-24T19:35:00.003-05:00

I wanted to make cookies with the boys. I have never actually made cookies with the kids for good reasons--too stressful with two super high-energy, not all that cooperative children. But my parents were coming into town, so I figured mom could help. I found the recipe for the above cookies. Cute, right? I wasn't excited about using three different dyes, but hey, it's festive! So anyway, the above picture is what they were supposed to look like.

My mom and I went to Target to look for cookie cutters in leaf shapes. Can you believe they didn't have them? So we decided to let the kids make circles, and then Brice could draw veins (you know, leaves!) in them with a toothpick (and I didn't have any, so of course I had to buy 300).

This is the boys in their cookie-making-glory. They look happy, right?

I thought I could get some cute pictures, since they were both actually enjoying the cookie-making. But when I said, "smile Harry!!" this is what I got. Classic. Oh well. And i'm telling you--he's my happy-go-lucky kid.

The cookies were actually delicious.

Maybe not totally accurate...

2011-09-29T10:51:00.001-05:00

but I like it.

Home and belonging and beauty

2011-07-01T22:13:00.004-05:00

Doesn't this look fabulous??? There is nothing I like more than, well, there are lots of things I like. But design magazines, design and decorating books. Mmm... And being home. And decorating my house. And the whole concept of home. And belonging.

I love beautiful things. I tend to decorate with lots of neutrals. Lots of whites and not too much color. I think color overstimulates me. But I love art. And pictures on my wall. And anywhere else I can fit them. Especially black and white pictures. I don't think i'd have the guts to decorate like this picture. But I love it.

When I graduated from college, I put my French to "great" use by working in an art gallery in Chicago. I helped the owner, who spoke wonderful french but had terrible grammar, translate letters. He would give me his incorrect and somewhat offensive letters. And I would translate them for him. Clean them up. But what I really got from this job was fantastic discounts on art. Really good art. And I made friends with the director of the gallery who also gave me some sweet little finds from the flea markets of Paris. I ate Ramen noodles and hot dogs for years because I spent all my (extremely meager!) salary on art.

Now we are finally in a home. A real home. We have a garage and a basement and a yard. We have been married six years and have rented three places, and bought one condo (what a disaster) and now here. I love our house because it's blue (and doesn't leak). And the previous owners were serial rehabbers and had great taste. But I mostly love it because it's ours. And we have no plans to move. And our boys have their own room. We can mark their years on their doorframes. We can scratch the floors and it's not a reduction in our deposit--it's memories. I'm ridiculously sentimental. Notches on the door frames. Scratches on the floor. I love the whole concept of home, belonging, and the longing for something more permanent, more perfect.

But I digress.

Home. Sigh...

Happy Birthday!!

2011-06-30T14:45:00.003-05:00

Happy Birthday, sweet Harry! We love you SO MUCH and are so happy God gave you to us. We love your sweet nature, your dramatic kisses, your indignant tantrums. We love watching you grow (my how you eat!), learn, and delight in the world (except any living creature that comes within 2 feet of you). You are a joy to raise and though someday you will leave us, as you should, we treasure these days we have with you.

Happy THIRD birthday, little man.

My loves and their lovies

2011-06-27T19:51:00.003-05:00

This is Harry and his lovie--brown blanket. It was given to him by a former work colleague of Seth's at his old law firm. It's a beautiful cashmere blanket with trees on the front. I started putting it in his crib (well, his pack n' play; Harry slept in it, in our bathroom, for a little over a year. Condo living...) as soon as I was no longer concerned about him suffocating. And he's now thoroughly attached to it. When we check on him at night, we usually find it like this, or in some other unusual pose in his bed.

This is Brice and his lovie--Blue Bunny. Brice claimed BB as his own shortly after Harry was born. When he was just a little guy, he would call him "Boo Baybum." Still kills me. Three years on now, and he still cuddles him fiercely all night long. And also takes him out and about when he needs a little extra support. Like when he had to have his tooth extracted--Brice and BB sitting in the dentist's chair, champing it. I'll be really sad when (or if?) Brice leaves BB behind.

Winter 2011, destroying your hard drive, blah blah...

2011-06-27T16:30:00.002-05:00

Harry helping out during "Snowpocalypse 2011" when we got about 12 feet of snow. I love a good snow storm, especially (only) when I don't have to be on the road . Seth didn't go to work, and spent a good portion of the day shoveling out a 5X5 little square of snow in our driveway. Of course, he had no shoes on, no gloves and no hat. Oh, the unfortunate things that get lost in a move! Thankfully our neighbors came and helped us out later on.

This is Brice and his "bestie" Evelyn. Evelyn's mom is one of my best friends. Brice and Evie are 9 months apart. And Harry and Luke (her son) are 9 days apart. We forced friendship upon them and they are mainly okay with that. Brice and Evie are both strong-willed, stubborn, leadership types (super fun as toddlers, lemme tell you!) and don't always get along. But this was a good day.

This is Harry. I love this picture. He is playing a pink piano in the kid's section of Neiman Marcus in downtown Dallas. The boys had never "seen" Santa Claus, so when we were in Dallas we took them (with their cousin, Luke) to see the NM Santa. And, oh my goodness. What an orgiastic display of the Christmas Spirit. Harrison was terrified of Santa, as was his ever-so-slightly younger cousin Luke. So they hung out in the toy section and pretended not to notice the goings-on one floor below.
This is Brice and Luke in Dallas. We wish that they were closer, but as is the case with most Texans, their parents have no interest in leaving Texas. Even for Chicago. Gasp! I guess our great weather couldn't woo them. Luke is a lovely little guy. When he wants a toy, he'll tackle the kid with a half-nelson until he gives up the goods. He fits right in with our family.

So, about that hard drive.

I've been yearning for a laptop for years. So when we bought this house, we decided we'd splurge on a laptop, too. That way I could actually read/write/surf/waste time in bed, as opposed to hunching over in a tiny corner of our unused dining room into the wee hours. The Apple Man told me I could bring in my desktop and my laptop and they would switch over all the info for me. Great. So I dropped it off and went to pick it up a few days later.

It's NEVER a good sign when they whisper, look at me, and say "ohhh, could you hold on a sec, we need to go over some things with you."

(flashback: this past winter I was at a church retreat for women (I know, shocking) and took a photography class. I laughingly mentioned that I had 6000 pics that I didn't know what to do with. The teacher was a little surprised when I said I didn't back them up, had heard about this procedure, but didn't actually know how to do it. So she told me. Then I forgot and never did it.)

Apple Man comes out with my desktop and a padded baggy and hands me "my hard drive." Why is my hard drive not in my computer? Oh, well it died. Oh, it died. Ok.

He gave me the card of a company in CA who could retrieve it all for me. I called the company. Yes, they could probably do it. For over twice the price I paid for the computer.

So, now my hard drive sits in my desk drawer, wrapped tightly in plastic padded baggy, awaiting next year's tax return.

Sigh...

I love my kids! Really!!!

2011-06-14T19:49:00.007-05:00

I realize that I often complain about my children. Say how awful they are (they are), say how much they drive me crazy (constantly), how they do nothing but fight and scream (true story). Yes, it's all true. They drive me crazy and I don't often have those transcendent, "i love my kids, they amaze me" moments. But I do love them. Really! So I thought i'd take a few minutes to say some nice things about my kids.

BRICE:

* he's amazingly smart: curious, thoughtful, intelligent
* he's soulful: on those rare occasions when it's only us and he looks into my eyes and tells me what he's thinking, i'm often left breathless
* he is endlessly enthusiastic
* he loves music: especially classical--he can identify different songs and tell you where he heard them last
* he is great with Scully: loves him desperately, tries to care for him like he's his parent.
* I am so curious to see what path he chooses when he grows up: I have my own ideas, but that's for another post

HARRY:

* he is possibly the happiest child you will ever meet: he is bubbly, playful, he doesn't walk--he hops and skips
* he is a very tender child: if you yell out in pain, he is the first at your side to make sure you're okay.
* he loves his brother: this amazes Seth and me. Brice is terrible to him, yet he keeps on loving him
* he is easy: if you discipline him, he repents. If you change plans, he can flow. Happily.
* he is endlessly cuddly: he will sit on your lap for hours if you read to him, turning his head frequently to kiss your face.

Yes, these are my children. I love them. I do. I look forward to this Fall, when they are both in preschool, but not at the same time. In the morning, it's me and Brice. In the afternoon, it's me and Harry. I look forward to them getting older, getting along. I look forward to enjoying motherhood more.

Yes, they drive me insane. They have driven me into therapy (love therapy!). But when they are quiet and focused on something, I look at them. Look at their blue/grey eyes and floppy hair. I drink them in at these times. I take them in and i'm deeply grateful.

Told you he is cute!

2011-06-07T17:19:00.000-05:00

Welcome Scully!

2011-06-05T22:27:00.002-05:00

So, I can't find my computer cords. Which means I can't upload pics of my newest love--Scully.

As I posted recently, we had plans to get a sweet little lab puppy at the beginning of July. However, everyone I talked to scared the bejeezus out of me, telling me I was insane and how much work lab puppies were. So cute, but hey, they stay puppies in spirit until they are 2 or 3. And frankly, that sounded like a LOT OF WORK. And then one afternoon, I was talking to my neighbor. She had just adopted a black lab puppy. I said something along the lines of "it's not THAT hard, right? I mean, it's not like having a newborn, right?" To which she replied, "well, actually..." I don't know the rest of what she said, because I raced back to my house and was on the phone with the breeder before she finished her sentence. CANCEL CANCEL!!!

So, after getting over my guilt of saying goodbye (pre-saying Hello) to my little lab, I decided to put the dog thing on hold. And then adopting an adult lab. But THEN, a couple weeks after getting (somewhat) moved into our new house, I was browsing the website of a breeder of goldendoodles. She had posted that they had a 12-week old housetrained goldendoodle up for adoption. I briefly told Seth my idea as I was dialing, and then she answered. No, they didn't have her anymore. But hey, they had a littler of minis that we could come see if we were interested. (Sidenote: they also occasionally sold litters of labs, so I thought we could go on a "fact-finding" trip to see the puppies and talk to her about the differences bt doodles and labs). The next day, we were on our way. To just look and talk.

But then...she handed me a dog to hold. He was creamy and fluffy and cuddly and he fell asleep in my arms. So I bought him. Right then and there. He was 7 weeks old. The next week (today!) we went to get him. Sweet little Scully is lovely and fluffy and cuddly and I could eat him up with a spoon! Brice named him (so much better than Gilbert, his other choice). He is the lovliest little guy and to prove it, i'm going to scour the house to find the cord to upload the pictures.

Welcome home, Scully.

Hold the Gluten!

2011-05-11T13:49:00.003-05:00

If you know us, and you know Brice, you know that things have not been easy. He's been a tough kid from the moment he was born--strong-willed, temper tantrums that would go for hours, defiance, moods (!!), etc. You name it. And if you have a tough kid, you know that whenever you talk about the issues, people give you LOTS of suggestions. Finally, after several people suggested this, we tried to put Brice on a gluten-free diet this past January.

It wasn't hard; we live by Trader Joes and Whole Foods, so we are close to lots of excellent gluten-free options. We've always been careful about food dye. The change we saw in Brice was amazing. He calmed down, he was happier, easier to work with (note: not easy; still Brice. Same issues, just at a very manageable level).

So, a few weeks ago, we decided to try and add a little gluten back in. And oh. my. goodness. The poor child. Poor us! It was night and day. It was hard for me to even be around him. So, for the past 5 or so days, we're back (all of us) off gluten. And even though i'm sure there is still some in his system, he's back to Brice. Hard, but happy-ish. Excitable, but accessible.

My predictions

2011-05-04T20:20:00.003-05:00

I've talked to several people over the past few weeks who do not watch American Idol. WHAT??? This is the best season EVER.

Simon Who???

But I know lots of you are watching and dying to know who will win. Let me tell you:

Top Four:
Haley
Scotty
Lauren
James

Top Three:
Scotty
Lauren
James

Top Two (can you guess?):
Lauren
James

Winner:
James

I think he's the best, but I also love a good story. And James has a good story.

Our newest addition!

2011-04-26T12:52:00.007-05:00

Yes, we are getting a dog. A puppy to be exact. I've wanted one since my own dog (a yellow lab) died when I was sixteen. We've not been in a place yet where it made sense to get a dog. We've either been in a small condo downtown or renting. And we wanted to wait until the boys were a bit older.

Seth was more reticent than I was, as he wasn't raised with a dog. He grew up in China and was always moving and a dog represented (and still does) restriction. But we figure by buying a house and having two little kids, we're already pretty restricted. And to me, I can't imagine raising kids and not having a dog. I grew up with one, and times playing with Gabe are some of my favorite childhood memories.

Frankly, I think i'm more nervous about bringing a puppy home than I would be bringing a third child home. At least with a baby, i'd (sorta) know what I was doing and know what to expect. And my youngest, Harrison, would not be terrified of a new baby. Harry is both fascinated with and terrified of dogs. He calls all dogs "scary puppy"--he always squeals when he sees them and desperately wants to pet them. But he just can't work up the courage. Brice, on the other hand, is fantastic with dogs. Very gentle. Puts his hand out for them to inspect him. He really wants to help me with the puppy and is hopeful that someday the dog will sleep in his room with him.

So, it should be quite a summer. New house, new dog, new neighbors. I'm sure it will be fine, right?

I mean, how hard could it be?? (cue ominous music...)

(note: our puppy has not actually been born yet; the above photo is a pic of a puppy who was born last year from the same parents we're getting ours from)

I promise

2011-04-25T22:30:00.001-05:00

to do a proper post very soon.

We bought a house!

2011-03-17T20:07:00.003-05:00

We finally did it. Six years and two children later, we are (in a month) homeowners. Technically, we've owned before. I tend not to think of our leaky condo in glowy "our first home" ways. It was a nightmare that is pretty much over (except for the ongoing lawsuit).
We moved out to Wheaton last year and love love love it. We love the area, the community, our church, the space, etc. We're buying the house thinking "this is it." This is where we plan to settle down, if two non-commital people can actually choke those words out. We were in our condo for almost 3.5 years. That is the longest either of us have lived anywhere since high school. So, this is a big deal. We're buying a fence and a playset and a dog! We're going to measure the boys against their doorframe every year and mark it in pen! (pencil) We're going to get to know the neighbors, paint the walls, stain the carpet and settle in for a good long stay.
Probably.

Happy Birthday

2011-02-14T18:02:00.002-06:00

Happy Birthday, Seth. You are more lovely, more dear to me each day. You are the hardest worker, the best father, the most patient, loving husband. I knocked it out of the park on the day I married you. If all fell away and all I had left was you, I'd still have everything.

Dallas

2011-01-14T13:10:00.000-06:00

October

2010-11-01T18:16:00.002-05:00

Oh, Halloween!

2010-11-01T14:16:00.003-05:00

We were SO looking forward to Halloween. Brice and Harry got their store-bought costumes from Target, we got them pumpkin baskets, face painting stuff, and more candy than I've ever bought in my life. We were ready.

Our good friend Dawn came to share in their first Trick or Treat.

I knew it was coming. I KNEW Harry would not take well to his new outfit. The child doesn't even like getting his diaper changed. He'll cry for half an hour when you put a coat on him. So, I knew what to expect. Harry screamed BLOODY MURDER for well over an hour. Even after we got Brice up and dressed and painted, Harry was still screaming. We trickortreated for a half hour, and still Harry screamed. Poor Seth had terrible ringing in his ears, as that is where Harry was perched.

THEN we forced Harry to get down and had Brice drag him to the door. The door opened. Candy was placed in his fat little fist. And Harry was hooked. Oh, man. He and Brice went running from house to house. Harry waved to everyone who answered the door, then ran to me (every time!) to show me what he got.

So what started out as a total train wreck (this post was almost titled, "SCREW YOU Halloween!!!) turned out to be a really fun, really special time.

My list

2010-10-12T20:08:00.001-05:00

I've been thinking about the things that make me happy. Not soul searching, just taking notice of what makes me smile. Herewith, a small sampling:

* freshly fluffed bathmats
* when my boys play and laugh together
* a nicely made bed--mine, preferably
* a new bottle of a tasty red
* spending time with my husband
* kicking leaves on a fall walk
* talking on the phone with my mom
* the fact that my boys have all their grandparents, all healthy
* traveling to new places
* staying at hotels
* sleeping in
* the first cup of coffee
* landing in an airport in a different country
* the hotdogs at Wrigley Field
* emails from Amy
* discovering a great book
* in the same vein, the Starbridge Series
* steak
* IKEA

county fair

2010-08-27T21:44:00.004-05:00

Brice and Harry check out the livestock.

Brice has a time out.

The boys ride the incredibly expensive rides.

Cow feed. My attempt at an artistic shot.

the 'burbs

2010-08-27T21:22:00.004-05:00

I've been thinking about this alot. The more we settle into Wheaton and find a routine, the more i've thought about what the real differences are between suburban living and city living. Then, with prompting from Robyn, I figured I'd blog it. Just for you, Robyn!!

I can't speak for anyone else's experience, but I feel like I can breathe out here. City living, with kids, wasn't for me. I always thought i'd live in Chicago, or any city for that matter, for life. Raise my kids there, send them to school, the whole bit. It just didn't turn out that way.

When Seth and I moved back to Chicago (from Brooklyn), we fell in love with the West Loop. It reminded us of Brooklyn. It was warehousey. It had a cool vibe. And it was a 15-minute walk from the Sears Tower where Seth worked. I was 6 months pregnant when we bought it. If we had already had a kid, maybe we would've ended up in Lincoln Park (think Park Slope) or Lincoln Square. But we were thinking "cool" not "kid friendly." So we bought a second floor condo with only two bedrooms. No room to play outside. Not a lot of room to play inside, either.

Then we found out it had a leak. Then the whole building leaked. Then we were in a very long, stressful, expensive lawsuit. Then our front wall was ripped out and replaced with plastic sheeting for 5 months. All that to say, it was stressful. And I wanted out. I wanted to move to the 'burbs, where we could have a yard and a basement. And we could own a house. And if the house leaked, so be it. At least we wouldn't be part of an association and have to fix it right away.

It was also really hard for us to find community. It took a long time to settle into a church. And after we moved to the West Loop, my two closest friends moved. One moved to the 'burbs. One moved to Denver (thanks for nothing, Lindsay!!). So for me, city living meant lack of community, stressful living situation, and very limited options of things to do with the kids. Because we were in the West Loop, we weren't close to the el. So we had to walk everywhere or drive (and thus pay lots in parking everywhere we went).

And life is more expensive in the city. Impossible to buy a house. Crazy expensive preschool. Very limited options for schooling. Chicago city tax.

Then, we finished the fix on the condo and could put it up for sale. And Seth got a new job in Itasca, by O'Hare. And he worked normal hours now. Yea!! A move to the 'burbs, cutting commuting time, would give us another two hours together. So, we put it up for sale and crossed our fingers. Ten weeks later, we sold it.

Now we live in Wheaton. It's lovely. It's green. The schools are great, the parking is free, the people are nice. We love it. We love our church (it's charismatic Anglican; how cool is that? Susan Howatch would be so proud!!). We're renting and it's so great to not have to worry about anything housing-related.

So, all that to say. We are really glad we made the switch. The boys love to run around in the yard. It feels more manageable. Less stressful. And we get more time together. Maybe if we had moved to Lincoln Park, which is more family-oriented, and Seth continued to work in the city, and we hadn't had any condo issues, we'd still be in the city. There are ways to make it work; lots of families love to raise their kids in Chicago. We just weren't one of them.

"my dad dressed me"

2010-08-25T21:06:00.003-05:00

Tonight the boys had a naked dinner (long story) so when Seth got home, he was in charge of dressing them for our post-dinner library/ice cream run. Brice came bounding down the stairs first, "mom look at my cool new shirt!" Um, it's 75 degrees outside. And he's wearing two different shades of green. It's definitely a look!

Then Harry comes down. He's wearing Brice's black T-shirt, that is still too big for Brice. And his too-small, navy sweats (!!) He could barely walk, the shirt was HUGE. I felt like sticking a sign on each of them that said, "my dad dressed me. "

Happiness

2010-08-25T17:36:00.002-05:00

Harry's birthday. Six weeks late...

2010-08-25T14:08:00.003-05:00

One of the best things about living in the 'burbs is the space. We threw Harry's 2nd birthday party in our backyard (something I never thought i'd be able to say!). Both sets of grandparents were there, along with friends, neighbors, and their swimsuit-clad children. Perfect. The kids played in the pool, made mudpies in the sandbox and climbed the playsets. Was there ever a better way to celebrate a 2 y/o than by making mudpies and splashing around in a pool? No.

Brice got full access to the potato chip bowl, and occasionally came up for air to eat some cake and take custody of Harry's new Yo Gabba Gabba dvd. The kids had a great time. The adults had some great drinks, and much merriment was made by all.

Happy Birthday, little Harry. We love you SO SO much.

South Beach, baby

2010-08-07T18:07:00.003-05:00

So, Seth and I have been doing the South Beach Diet for the past few weeks. I've dieted on and off before, but never with any results. Last month I had my blood drawn and was told my cholesterol was ridiculously high. I tried to explain it was genetic, but she wasn't sympathetic. Around the same time, Seth's life insurance guy suggested he go on the SBD in order to get a better rate on life insurance. Ouch.

So, we both started this together. The first week was rough. Seth was in a rotten mood and I kept sneaking ice cream. But now it's actually working. We don't crave junk anymore. We've stopped eating "white" carbs and eat mainly veggies, lean meats, dairy, and some fruit. Even my pants are starting to hang on me. Yea for South Beach!!!

Our new digs!

2010-06-26T21:11:00.003-05:00

Our new sandbox. I wasn't a fan at first. I hate sand. It gets everywhere. But they love it. Especially Harry. He can spend an hour filling a bucket and then dumping it out.

Our new playsets. Thank goodness for Craigslist! They like to pile on the slide and ram into each other. They are such boys!!!

Cape Cod with a white picket fence. How Americana can you get? It's perfect for us and we're so grateful to have it! (we're renting for a year; see previous post)

the dunes

2010-06-25T14:14:00.003-05:00

Update

2010-06-10T13:39:00.002-05:00

So, the last you heard, we were waiting for an offer on our place, a condo in downtown Chicago. I think it was the same day, definitely the same week, when we got it--an offer. Now, we had imagined that moment many times where we look at each and start laughing and doing the happy dance in our kitchen. But it didn't quite turn out that way. After we crunched some numbers and decided we could afford to sell it for the lower-than-we-wanted offer, we got the really bad news--she had an FHA loan. NOOOO!!!!!

We didn't really know why FHA was bad news, but we were about to find out. During the two months between accepting the offer and actually moving, there was no point when we could really embrace the fact that we were moving and get excited about it. Seth likened the whole experience to running through a war zone and dodging bullets. There were outstanding assessments, outstanding special assessments, lawsuits, etc. Our association was like cottage cheese. The building is solid (thanks to our rebuild), and the association was well run, but we didn't think a government agency would be able to see past all of that and actually approve our condo for the loan. But they did.

And then one hour later, three weeks before we are scheduled to move, we got sued. That's right--we got served. The Sheriff showed up at our door and served us, and our neighbors, with papers. It seems our developer never fully paid a plumbing company for all the work they had originally done on our building. The plumber had filed a lien and was now foreclosing on the lien. How did the FHA folks miss this? It seems he only sued us by name, and not PIN number, so when they ran a search, they missed it. Can you believe it?

Our attorney managed to get Chicago Title to agree to cover this lien, as we had title insurance, and the FHA lender didn't have a problem and agreed to fund the loan. So, two weeks out, we finally have assurance the sale is going to go through. But then, the next ball drops--the closing date we thought we had (6.4.10) was not possible. We needed to close on May 27. It's now May 20th. We don't have a place to live, as we were advised throughout this entire process not to put money down on anything, since we had no assurance that the sale was actually going to go through.

Seth takes a half day off work, and drives around Wheaton, Winfield, and Glen Ellyn and literally knocks on doors and calls numbers and actually found us a place to live. A real house!! That's also a long story, but suffice it to say it was a total God thing and we are very grateful.
We had 5 days to pack. I took the boys away and Seth packed for two days. Then we returned and Brice got sick. Like, pukey sick. They day before we moved, my parents took both boys and Seth and I stayed up all night packing, then moved, then unpacked in 2 days.

Whew.

quote

2010-05-08T00:50:00.002-05:00

A child kicks its legs rhythmically through excess, not absence, of life. Because children have abounding vitality, because they are in spirit fierce and free, therefore they want things repeated and unchanged. They always say, Do it again; and the grown-up person does it again until he is nearly dead. For grown-up people are not strong enough to exult in monotony. But perhaps God is strong enough... It is possible that God says every morning, Do it again, to the sun; and every evening, Do it again, to the moon. It may not be automatic necessity that makes all daisies alike: it may be that God makes every daisy separately, but has never got tired of making them. It may be that He has the eternal appetite of infancy; for we have sinned and grown old, and our Father is younger than we. --G. K. Chesterton

What to do, what to do...

2010-03-30T22:29:00.002-05:00

This June marks our five year anniversary. We have been dreaming and thinking and pondering what to do to properly celebrate this momentous event. Five years and two kids, one nasty lawsuit, a leaky condo, two jobs at big law firms, and the like. So, at least to us, it's a big deal. One to be properly feted. Here's what we are thinking:

* London to visit dear friends and have a proper roasted dinner, lots of beer and curry and tea.
* Paris--we know no one and I speak just enough to humiliate us. But who doesn't love Paris??
* China/Hong Kong-- Seth grew up in China and is always itching for a visit "back home." We want to walk around, see the sights, absorb the vibe and EAT.
* NYC--we haven't been back since we moved four years ago. We want to go and visit old friends and eat (no big surprise there) at Burger Joint, have sesame ice cream in Chinatown, shaved ice in Koreatown, saganaki at Yanni's in Brooklyn, and dumplings at Wonton Garden.

The rub is that we will have precious little time. We strong-armed my parents into keeping the boys for two nights. I don't think we could do China or Singapore (oh, I didn't mention Singapore? The food...) on that time schedule. What will probably happen is that we will go to Saugatuck or perhaps, Leelanau Peninsula for a little getaway. That's ok. The big trips can wait. For now, it's just nice to be together.

Getaway

2010-03-26T14:09:00.003-05:00

Our room at Hotel Palomar. I love the color scheme.

Don't you love the picture above the bed? Made to look like a mirror reflecting a very cool scene.

I'm pretty sure we were the first ones to stay in this room--don't you think?? I wonder if it even has batteries yet!

Relaxed and happy.

So we got away last night. Our good friend Dawn agreed to babysit overnight (!!) and we went to stay at the Hotel Palomar in Chicago. They are just opening and were running lots of specials, so we jumped at the chance to get away and treat ourselves.

Coincidentally, it was right around the corner from a restaurant we've been dying to try--XOCO. It's one of Ricky Bayless's places--street foody and casual. They only serve tortas and soups and desserts, but oh. my. goodness. It was amazing. Oh, and the churros. How I love churros! (Our churros consumption alone bumped us up to Executive Status at Costco!!) What a lovely way to spend an evening--good beer, amazing food, and churros. Oh, and no children.

Two months and counting...

2010-03-25T13:41:00.002-05:00

Our place has now been on the market for two months. We were encouraged to put it on the market in mid-January so people could take advantage of the tax incentive that is due to run out in a month. So far, nothing.

We've had lots of open houses and showings, but not much interest. While I am thankful for the work our realtor is doing, it's a real drag. For one, your place has to be spotless. Try doing that with two kids. We had to rent a storage unit to get rid of a bunch of stuff so our place wouldn't look crowded. Then we have to haul all the toys into the storage place under our stairs every time there is a showing. The toys remaining in our place have to be picked up, neatly organized, and out of the way. "Looks bad with toys everywhere." That was a helpful piece of feedback, wouldn't you say? Plus, and here's the kicker, all the showings and open houses are in the middle of the afternoon, which means the boys don't get to nap. And y'all know how much fun little kids are when they are being dragged around and not allowed to sleep.

Here's hoping lightening strikes soon!!

Talk nice to me!!!

2010-03-24T10:22:00.004-05:00

Brice. Oh my. That child. God has big plans for him; I'm convinced of it. I am determined to raise him right and teach him well. And apparently, Brice has the same plans for me!!

For the past six months, he has been correcting me and calling me out on any unsavory behavior. He even pauses in the middle of his tantrum, when I have raised my voice ever so slightly, to point his finger at me and proclaim, "mama, talk NICE to me!!!" All I can do is laugh. Sometimes. Other times I childishly point my finger at him and say, "no Brice, YOU talk nice to ME." We are quite a pair.

A few months ago, he started this:
He was in his highchair, throwing a tantrum. Instead of walking over and slapping him upside the head, I exhibited a tiny bit of self control and refrained. Instead, I did one of those really deep, annoying, self-righteous sighs. Over and over. Again, he paused, mid-tantrum and said, "mama, don't [really overdramatized deep, annoying, self-righteous sigh]. I cracked up. So did he. Now it's our thing. When I want to grab him by the scruff of his neck and throw him out into traffic, instead, I sigh. Deeply and loudly. Then Brice does the same. And we both laugh.

Trickle down attention span

2010-03-20T21:48:00.002-05:00

I've never had much of an attention span. Except maybe for when I was really young. We had no computers (or any technology, really) and the amount of television and phone time we could have was severely limited. So I read. And played with my dog, listened to music, rode my bike, and hung out with my friends. I could sit for hours and read or just walk and daydream.

I can't really do that anymore. And I don't think it's just because of the kids. Although I blame them, primarily. I think partly it's lack of discipline to force myself to focus on just one thing. Too many magazines. Too much web surfing and emailing and a general lack of engagement with whatever or whomever I was actually engaging with (sorry for the poor grammar).

And of course having kids doesn't help. I'm rarely doing just one thing. Usually i'm doing several things at a time, and I hate it. I hate that feeling of never finishing anything--a task, a thought, a conversation. I often leave social situations riddled with guilt over all the conversations I couldn't finish with people. Did they think I wasn't interested in them or didn't care about what they were saying? I sincerely hope not.

I need to stop. To take more time to do nothing--constructively. To do nothing but read. Or write an actual (gasp!) letter. I don't have much alone time during a typical day. But I have some. The bills and laundry can wait (it pains me to say that). The computer can definitely wait. I need to figure out how to be present again--present to life, present to myself, and present to God.

New Year's Eve Balloons

2010-01-21T20:43:00.002-06:00

I tried for like, twenty shots, to get a picture of them sitting with their balloons. No such luck. Here's the story:
On NYE day, I took them to the local party store to pick out their NYE balloon. Harry chose the Elmo one (what else?) Brice originally got the Big Bird one (he is so over Elmo!), but that deflated within 24 hours. So, we went back and replaced it with... a purple princess balloon. He was talking about it even when Big Bird still had some life left in him. So when I told him we were going to get a replacement balloon, he said, "I want the purple princess balloon." Now, as a mother of two boys, I hadn't even noticed the purple princess balloon. But he had. And he wanted it.
As soon as we got home, he pulled it down to our level and pointed to each princess and said, "talk to me about her." (I think he got that from preschool). So we talked about each princess and why she was special. He loves his balloon. He loves being able to identify each princess. He really likes Cruella Devil (no big surprise there), from a preview on a Disney video. Anyway, just thought i'd share. We got a real kick out of it.

Our weekend

2010-01-19T21:48:00.003-06:00

Brice got sick on Saturday

Harry got sick on Sunday

I somehow managed to stay healthy and made my first Beef Burgundy. It was gooood.

'sup

2010-01-17T16:28:00.002-06:00

A few folks have asked me how the napless wonder is doing lately, so I thought i'd update. He's sleeping a little better. This past week he fell asleep each day with Brice in the same room. A few times he woke up screaming and I was able to get him back to sleep in the PNP in our bathroom. A couple days he actually slept 2+ hours before waking. So, there's progress. I remain hopeful.

The really exciting news, however, isn't sleep-related. Tomorrow (Monday) we put the condo up for sale. I'm hopeful we'll sell quickly (like, in 6 months) so we can finish selling out completely and move to the suburbs. I always swore I wouldn't be that mother. We'd drive a station wagon (not a minivan). My kids would go to museums, not playgroups. They would grow up taking subways and taxis and go to urban schools, not those safe, snotty, suburban schools. But now, after several years in the city (15!) and two kids, I realize that the real snob was me. I thought everyone that moved to the 'burbs was a sell-out. Abandoning the city, abandoning the schools that needed them, etc. Now, after having taught several years on Chicago Southside, I have very complicated feelings about the urban schools and what the problems/solutions are. But I digress.

Anyhoo, we finally bought a minivan and I LOVE it. It's sportier than my Honda. The doors open by themselves. There is a DVD player (that my husband very rightly accuses me of using too much; c'est la vie!) I heart it. I really really heart it. And now I can't wait to move to the 'burbs. I want a basement; a yard; neighbors. Maybe i'm selling out? I don't know. But i'm not losing any sleep over it. Strip malls and chain restaurants--here we come!

Not Fair

2010-01-05T14:33:00.002-06:00

I don't know what's wrong with him. First it was switching to one nap--bound to be some bumps. Then it was all four molars at once--must've hurt. Then I tried (and tried) to put them together for naps. But the child will not nap. He always screams bloody murder and sometimes falls asleep. For an hour...maybe. I've tried putting him in the bathroom, again, nothing. He just won't nap. My child went from two good naps to screaming his bloody head off and not napping AT ALL. I don't get a single break all day. My two year old is ornery and tantrum-y most of the time, and then when he goes down for his three hour nap, my 18 m/o turns ornery and tantrum-y. UGH!!!!!!! What one year old doesn't nap??? THIS SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Going on two months with maybe an hour nap. Kill me. Just kill me now.

Is this normal? Tell me no!

2009-12-31T12:46:00.002-06:00

So, my Harrison, my lovely, easy, sleeps anytime he's horizontal 18 m/o has stopped napping. Just up and stopped. About 6 weeks ago he was cutting all four molars (or whatever those big ones are) and I think that's where the trouble started. But he's gone from two long naps a day to ... nothing. I want to try having him nap with his brother instead of in his PNP in our bathroom, but he will literally scream bloody murder for sometimes 25 minutes, then wake up screaming, or he will scream for over an hour. Why??? Is it possible to go from two long naps to no naps at all? I know he's tired, as he'll fall asleep in the car at nap time. What is going on?

more attempts at a picture

2009-12-12T21:50:00.001-06:00

hey Santa, help a kid out!

2009-12-12T21:47:00.002-06:00

O Christmas Card, O Christmas Card!

2009-11-30T09:32:00.003-06:00

We do not have good luck with our Christmas cards. By that I mean, we never have a decent picture of all of us to put on it. Nothing recent, anyway. A nice family shot from January doesn't cut it. Two years ago, I put separate ones of Seth and me with Brice on the card and Seth thought it looked like we were divorced. Last year we tried, oh how we tried, to get a group shot. Didn't happen. This year we have been trying to get a shot of the boys together. It's like trying to direct water bugs. They just won't sit still/smile/cooperate/stop smacking each other. We don't even really have great shots of them individually. The best one I have of Brice he is wearing a diaper on his head and Harry always has some toy hanging out of his mouth. Oh well.

Big day for a little boy

2009-11-30T07:29:00.003-06:00

We finally cut Harry's hair.
I had trimmed it a few times, but it got to the point where it was looking seriously raggedy and needed a proper cut. I was hesitant because Harry does not like it when people mess with him--wash him, change his diaper, dress him, etc. Most diaper changes end with me breaking a sweat and whining about a possible sprained wrist.
We took him to KidSnips on Clybourn and he actually did really well. There were a few tears (good for pictures!) but no major tantrums or fits. Good job, Harrison!

Yo ho ho!!!!

2009-10-28T10:20:00.001-05:00

Brice dressed up as a pirate for his preschool Halloween party.
kinda precious, eh?

Bathtime fun

2009-10-28T09:53:00.002-05:00

Estes Park

2009-09-30T23:04:00.003-05:00

The cousins: Luke, Brice, and Harry

My dear friend, Lindsay. She now lives in Denver and tackled the mountains to come for a visit. This shot is for Richard!

Hiking in Rocky Mountain National Park. We look kinda outdoorsy, eh?

Brice was wild about the elk, so we went elk watching almost every day.

Harry checks over the safety instructions when he hears we're in an exit row!

sleeping

2009-09-15T11:28:00.003-05:00

About six weeks ago, we put the boys in the same room together. Finally. Harry slept in a pack n play in our bathroom for over a year. We even bought him a nice little mattress that fit in it because we (I) felt so badly for him. We weren't sure what to expect. At the time, Harry took about a half hour to go down. As soon as i'd put him down, he stand up and yell and scream and finally wear himself out. When we put Brice down, he'd toss everything out of his crib and then wail and whine till we went in and retrieved it all. We tried being tough and making him sleep in an empty crib and the child screamed for two hours. Ugh.

So, we put Harry's pnp in Brice's room for the first two weeks while we waited for his crib to arrive. The first few nights Harry wailed for an hour in the middle of the night. Brice never woke up. Amazing. Then, Brice learned how to climb out of his crib. One morning Seth got up and found them both in Harry's pnp. Harry was chewing on a straw Brice had retrieved for him and Brice was quietly clipping his nails with a clipper he had snatched from who knows where? Anyway, we quickly ordered a crib tent and Brice loves it. I think he feels cozy in it. He can't throw anything out, so he actually goes to sleep immediately. And Harry, now that he's snug in his crib with Brice nearby, falls asleep right away too. No more crying, no more wailing and whining and screaming. We put them down together and they sleep for 11 to 12 hours a night.

Thank you, Jesus.

Maestro

2009-09-15T10:14:00.003-05:00

Brice loves music. So far, it's the only thing we've found that will calm and focus him. Last year, we were watching the inauguration and Brice was bouncing off the walls. When Perlman and Yo-Yo Ma played, he sat and was enrapt for the entire time. We bought him a DVD of them playing Dvorak in Prague and he watches it everyday. He has the entire thing memorized. He stands and conducts. He stares when the soprano sings. And until recently, he used every random thing he could find to pretend he was playing violin like Perlman. Last week we bought him his very own violin--albeit a toy one. And he loves it. Loves it.

Free at last, Free at last!!!

2009-09-14T10:50:00.002-05:00

We are done. Through! Hooray!!

Yes, you guessed it, we saying BUH-BYE to law firm life. This past Wednesday Seth accepted an in-house position with a company in the western suburbs of Chicago. It's been a long time coming. When we first got married, we lived in NYC, where Seth was a corporate attorney with a huge firm. We never saw each other. Never. We went two months without having dinner together. We decided if we wanted a chance at making it, we had to move out of NYC. So, Seth has been with a firm in Chicago for the past three and half years. It's been better. Slightly. But the nature of law firm life--you're always on call; when you're on a deal, you work until it's done; late late nights, weekends, etc. We have had exactly one vacation since we got married. I love my husband and family, but we haven't exactly had a normal family life.

All that's about to change.

And so it begins...

2009-09-05T14:49:00.004-05:00

Anybody that has spoken to me for more than five minutes in the past three years knows that we have had housing issues. Big ones. Here's the story:

Seth and I bought this lovely, second floor condo in the West Loop of Chicago. Walking distance from where Seth works (the Sears/Willis Tower). We were SO excited. We had an inspector come and check it out (all the while being trailed by our developer and his agent, no more than two feet behind us at all times). The inspector pointed out that the corner of the wall at the bottom was all wet, the drywall was mushy. The developer promised us this was because they hadn't finished sealing the deck above us. We believed them and signed the papers.
We fought tooth and nail with our developer for the next year to complete the punch list. Legally, they had to have it done within two months. It took a year; I won't bore you with the huge list of things to be completed and fixed.

Anyway, one month after they finally replaced the moldy floorboard, I notice that water was dripping into our place from the wood above the sliding door. One month later, it's gushing into the basement of our first floor neighbor's place.
So, a few months later, we learn that we (and our three other neighbors) have to have our front wall ripped out because it was full of mold. This was two months before I gave birth to Harry. This is not good news. So, they rip our wall out and put plastic sheeting up. The sheeting was only supposed to be up for a week or so. The developer promised they would fix the leak issue and rebuild the inside of our place. Well, after a little tinkering, everyone realized the problem was much much larger and wildly more expensive to fix than originally thought.

It kept leaking. The developer disappeared. The plastic sheeting was up for five months. We had no sunshine in our place for the entire spring and summer last year. And the entire front of our building looked like someone rubbed it with chalk.

Harry naps in our super depressing living room.

Brice, not knowing the ulcer this is causing his mother, thinks it's kinda fun, really.

The construction site outside our building. Our neighbors, who are trying to sell, are none too pleased.

Like I said, after five months, we finally took the plastic sheeting down when we realized it wasn't going to get fixed anytime soon. We had drywall up, but no molding. We hired a company to come tell us what the problem was and they produced a huge binder with a detailed description of the problem and solutions. Turns out the condo was built in the winter (not great for brick work), wasn't built by masons, had wax paper (basically) for flashing. There's more, but that's when it gets technical. Anyway, we hired a local company to basically rip the front off and rebuild it. Now, we actually have a hope of being able to sell this place. Believe me, it'll be the sturdiest condo on the block.

Priming the Pump

2009-09-04T13:24:00.002-05:00

It's been awhile, I know. Lots has been going on, but i've not posted a peep. Here's why:
Harry chewed up my USB cord and what's a post without a picture?
BUT I am off to get one today, because....
Construction has started on our house! Why construction, you ask? Well, that's a long story, involving a lawsuit and a crooked developer and our fear that posting the saga could scare off future buyers (Seth's fear, not mine; I assume about four people read this blog anyway!)
Anyway, the front of our building is being sawed off and it's really quite impressive looking. Sort of like a European Cathedral.
And there's more... but I can't post about it quite yet.

(no, i'm not prego)

My own little Chatty Cathy doll

2009-09-04T13:20:00.002-05:00

One year ago, Brice wasn't talking much. We had read that kids should have at least one word by the time they are 18 months. Brice had a sort of elegant grunt that Seth and I could usually decipher. That was it. Oh, how times change! The kid talks all day long now. Really, all day. A constant stream of words, patched together thoughts and sentences. He repeats things; he narrates things; he tells on Harry; he makes requests; he complains; but most of all, he tries to get my attention. The child talks more than Oprah. Seth and I have checked on him in his sleep and sometimes he'll even say a few words while he is out cold.

Talk about making up for lost time!

Goodbye, old friend

2009-07-19T13:22:00.003-05:00

You will be missed, especially in the morning.

Getting the shot

2009-07-18T23:11:00.002-05:00

Got it!!!

More pics from the weekend

2009-07-07T20:53:00.004-05:00

Harry's first birthday cake

Getting a little love from Brice

My sweet little guy; so much more cuddly than his brother. I love him for it.

Brice, despite all warning and threats, splashes Harry.

Harry would not sit still for a picture.

Harry's First Birthday, or We Made It!!!!!

2009-07-07T14:47:00.007-05:00

This past weekend we celebrated Harry's first birthday (which actually took place on June 30th). I still can't quite believe we made it. I really can't believe it's been a year!!! I remember bringing him home from the hospital, Seth driving and me and Harry in back. It was lovely in Chicago and Harry was snoozing and I thought, "this is as peaceful as it's going to be for a while." And while, yes, I tend to look on the not-so-bright side of life at times, I was right on that one!

Harry was colicky just like his brother, and Brice, who has never been easy or remotely mild-mannered, took his tempers and attitude to new, dizzying heights. It was rough, rough going for a while. Even after Harry stopped crying, Brice kept on raging. In January we enrolled him (not even two years old!) in preschool. More for my sanity and to extend Brice's life expectancy than anything else. But it's done us all a world of good and it seems that his tantrums and raging are waning. He actually likes his brother, now, too. He hated Harry for a long time and we weren't able to get a picture of them together for nine months. NINE months!!!

Harry is the sweetest, happiest little guy now. He eats like a teenager and only screams if you put him in his highchair without immediately putting a dish full of food in front of him. I'm telling you, the boy can eat!!!! He only weighs just over 20 pounds (12%; not that we care) and he's in the 68% for height (really, we're not keeping track). He's only in the 40% for head circumference, though (but who remembers the percentiles anyway, right?) He's not walking, but he pulls up on everything and everyone and he babbles all day long.

We are hugely grateful to God and to everyone who helped us all get through this year: my parents who helped out whenever they could, especially my mom who came at the drop of a hat when I didn't think I could go on; Seth's parents who prayed us through this year and took over all care of the boys, the house, and myself when they came to visit; Caitlin, our part-time nanny who is the loveliest, most patient person you could hope to have helping care for your kids.
And here's a quick shout-out to the inanimate objects that we couldn't have done without, too: the BOB Duallie, the Ergo, and of course...Elmo!!

My cutie pies

2009-07-02T10:08:00.003-05:00

I'm not crazy!

2009-06-10T19:15:00.002-05:00

I was talking to my downstairs neighbor the other day and she asked if everything was okay with Brice. "Fine," I replied. As fine as they can be with a two year old. She went on to say that last Sunday, early afternoon, her husband came out of the office and said he could hear Brice upstairs. "Wow, poor Danielle," he said. Yes, I remember it well. We had just returned from church and Brice had one bee or another in his bonnet and was throwing one heck of a fit. Nothing out of the ordinary for him. It was so loud that the light fixture in the downstairs office was shaking!
I should have been embarrassed. Mortified.
I was elated. I felt justified. I've been telling people how Brice has these tantrums--not everyday, but just about--that just blow your eardrums. He screams uncontrollably. He thrashes. He wails. He goes completely over the edge and can't calm down. Sometimes Seth and I can talk him down from the ledge. Sometimes we can maintain our calm and let him scream it out (it can take as little as 15 minutes, or can go on for over an hour). Sometimes we jump off the cliff with him and we all end up screaming and crying.
This has been going on for over a year. We are tired. Someday this will change, people tell us. Sometimes we believe them.
But in the meantime, it's nice to have other people taste the madness and tell us we're not crazy.

Four years!!!

2009-06-04T13:10:00.004-05:00

Four years ago today we took the plunge in Grand Rapids and got hitched. It's been the busiest, craziest, happiest four years of my life. Herewith, our marriage in numbers:

Two cities (NYC and Chicago)
Three homes
Two water leaks
One lawsuit (more on that at some point)
Two babies
Eight months of screaming (the kids that is)
Three jobs
Four strollers
Four carseats

Lots of traveling
Lots of visiting
Lots of family
Lots of meeting
Lots of leaving

Lots of Love

Happy Anniversary, baby!

Springtime in Chicago

2009-05-15T10:11:00.003-05:00

Seth and Brice running in the field outside the Nature Museum.

Harry catching the breeze outside the Nature Museum.

The Diehl men enjoying a Boynton classic.

Sidewalk chalk on the balcony. What a city kid!!

Snuggling with my boys.

John & Kate + 8 = So Annoying!!

2009-03-25T22:05:00.003-05:00

We don't have cable. But i've been hearing about this show since it came on. So the last time I was at Blockbuster, I decided to rent the first season. Now admittedly, i'm far more interested in the first six months of the 'tuplet's life; wouldn't you love to see how they handled that? And I have to say, after watching several shows, I find it really annoying. First of all, i'm not sure this is the best show for me to watch to unwind :) And seriously now, how incredibly rude and condescending is Kate? She's awful!! Her poor husband. I would be so ashamed if I spoke to my husband like that and she does it repeatedly, on television! And he mostly just takes it!! I mean, who knows what goes on behind closed doors, but I just get so worked up when I watch her. Wow.

A question for all you parents

2009-03-24T22:52:00.002-05:00

I don't think this experience is unique, but i'm wondering how you all handle it:
When you are feeding a toddler, and said toddler has no interest in what is on his plate, do you offer alternatives, or do you wish him a good night and put him down with a semi-empty belly?
Brice rarely eats what we give him (all healthy, tasty, toddler-friendly fare) and we end up giving him veggie chips, pecans, goldfish, oranges, etc. Like tonight, I gave him some salmon, couscous, and green beans (I know, right?) and he had zero interest in any of it. He drank his milk and filled up on some veggie chips (a misleading moniker if there ever was one).
I don't want to always be scrambling to fill him up and I don't want to give in to his tyrannical tendencies. What to do, what to do...

tasty

2009-03-07T22:23:00.002-06:00

Guess who made Yorkshire Pudding? (not Seth)

Family Time

2009-03-05T15:45:00.006-06:00

Harry can't quite participate in mealtime yet, but he refuses to sit on the sidelines.

Elmo joins us for dinner.

We finally found a good use for the Elmo swim diapers.

Brice's birthday

2009-03-05T15:30:00.005-06:00

We celebrated Brice's second birthday this past weekend. Our little man turned two years old. It hardly seems possible. It feels like a few weeks ago that we brought him home from the hospital and sat on the couch to watch Grey's Anatomy while he slept peacefully on Seth's chest. Now he's two. The days may drag, but the years fly by. We got him a (what else?) Elmo cake and Nana and Papa got him a tricycle and a Rockin' Elmo. When I brought the cake out, right after this picture was taken, he stuck his hand in the candle and managed to put out the flame with his index finger. Woops--didn't see that one coming!

Seattle ( i love you )

2009-03-05T14:25:00.005-06:00

Bainbridge Island

lunch

Harry and me in front of a delicious Russian bakery (when you see a picture of a smiling Anthony Bourdain with the staff, you know it's good. and it was.)

the iconic shot

We had a great time in Seattle--such a cool city with a really cool vibe. The whole city smells like a faint mix of coffee and patchouli. It was supposed to rain everyday, but we managed to get in -- and out-- without seeing any. It did, however, snow one day. This was more of a shock to the locals than to us. Apparently they're not used to snow in the winter (why don't i live there??). We stayed downtown and had a view of the bay and mountains from our bed. We ate raw oysters at the same restaurant where Tom Hanks and Rob Reiner had their "tiramisu conversation." We bought a couple crabs and had a picnic of crabs and beer in our room while Harry slept. We visited the best bookstore in the world, then rode the ferry to Bainbridge Island and had dinner down by the marina (where Harry sampled his first garlic and mashed potatoes dish). Perhaps the best thing was being forced to be on Harry's schedule. We shared a room with him, so while he slept, so did we--15 hours a day.

Vacation's all I ever wanted...

2009-02-23T22:57:00.002-06:00

Vacation had to get away!!! (brings back memories, doesn't it??).
So, yes: we're going on vacation. And by "we" I mean me, Seth, and Harry. Since Brice isn't in his most easy-going stage of life, and since he adores his grandparents, we decided to leave him here and have Nana and Papa come and stay/play with him. We jetting off to Seattle on Wednesday. We originally had this planned in mid-January when it was freezing outside (not that much has changed). We figured even though Seattle isn't exactly Cabo, it has to be a little warmer, right? Sort of. Latest weather prediction is that it will be about 5 degrees warmer ... and raining everyday. But we're getting away. We're going to strap Harry into the Ergo and just walk in the rain. We're going to visit the MotherShip (the original Starbucks), watch them throw fish in Pike's Place, go that big ole bookstore, maybe to a coffee crawl. We're going to sleep lots and eat local, and have a good time with the little bean.

What is up with my children???

2009-02-19T14:34:00.002-06:00

Raising Brice is killing me. It really is. He turns two tomorrow and has the attitude to prove it. We're entering the "I want to do everything myself" phase. Except that he can't actually say this. He does talk, but it's more like he says things that only we can interpret. He mostly screams and yells and throws tantrums. And his newest thing is that he does not nap. He's exhausted, but he stands in his crib and talks, then yells, then screams. For hours. I refuse to get him up, so that he can bug me and cry and cling and scream when he should be sleeping. So I leave him. And he usually falls asleep after 2 or 2.5 hours. This sucks. Harry has been screaming through the night recently. Now that he's 8 months old, I (and Seth and the good Dr.) think he should start sleeping through the night. Harry does not agree. This week I had three nights in a row where I slept maybe 4 hours combined. And i'm so stressed out by the lack of sleep and the general existence of Brice that even when I could sleep, I can't. Someone please remind me. Why did I have children????

Recent shots of the boys

2009-02-14T14:58:00.003-06:00

Harry finally sitting up on his own and enjoying some delicacies.

Brice shows Harry how to make the music play. Good big brother.

Brice gets a big boy/"i'm not a girl" haircut. Cute!!

Helping dad get dressed in the morning.

Delicious, isn't he?

"Winter in Chicago" or "How to be sick for three months straight"

2009-02-13T20:15:00.003-06:00

Before I had children, I never minded the winters in Chicago. The bitter winds, occasional blizzards, neverending freezing temps. Now, it is different. Besides the whole being stuck inside a small-ish condo with nowhere to go if I did manage to get everyone coated up and down the stairs and in the stroller/car, I forgot to factor in the sickness thing. I didn't realize how often kids got sick in the winter and how quickly and tenaciously it spreads to the rest of us. Last year, Brice got one cold that lasted a week. No biggie. This year, we are on our third major illness. First, Brice got a nasty cold that went on and on and on. Went to the doctor who examined Brice and pronounced him "sick but basically healthy." (Brice was so out of sorts and so NOT into being examined that when the doctor tried to listen to him breathe, Brice donkey kicked him in a very sensitive area. Once the doctor recovered, he made a comment to the effect of "he's a strong one, isn't he?" Yes, he is.) I don't remember the date, but it was the day Rod Blagoevich got arrested.
Then, two weeks into January, Brice got another nasty cold, complete with phlegmy cough and drippy nose and goopy eyes and sour attitude. Harry then contracted the same thing with an added bonus: ear infection. This lasted two weeks. We had a week or so of relatively good health, then Brice, Harry, and Seth got some nasty GI bug. Seth was better in 36 hours, but the boys are still fighting something. They've stopped throwing up, but still have diarrhea. Bad. And they're not eating much. And while Harry remains pretty happy, Brice is back to his old ornery self. And I am still doing laundry, disinfecting everything they come in contact with and praying I don't get whatever they have. Because it's ugly.
But we've almost made it. It's almost Spring. Warm weather. No more big puffy coats. And hopefully no more sick, hacking, poopy, ornery children.

25 Random Things About Me

2009-01-29T23:09:00.002-06:00

I put this together for Facebook and thought i'd share it with you as well.

1. I've not worn any nail polish color (other than French manicure) since high school.
2. Ditto that for lipstick. I went through a red lipstick phase my senior year and since then it's been lip gloss.
3. The first time I ever cried over a death was when my dog, Gabriel, died.
4. I almost named my second son Gabriel, but thought it might be too weird.
5. I don't like eating enough to cook a big meal for just myself. When I was single I ate popcorn and cheese and Diet Coke for dinner. I was 30 pounds lighter.
6. Epidurals do not work for me the way they work for others. If I ever have another child, I won't bother getting one.
7. My husband still gives me butterflies. Especially when he gets a good haircut.
8. I always say, "that's funny" and don't laugh. Why is that?
9. Contrary to what Lindsay says, I have never, not once, finished a NYT Sunday puzzle. I always try them, though.
10. I am so tired of living in a cold climate and living here with children is killing me. I want to play outside again!
11. I was extremely loyal as a child and agonized when someone asked me to be their best friend, as I already had a best friend who lived far away. It kept me up at night. I even was so loyal to McDonalds I felt massive guilt the first time I ate at Burger King.
12. I used to journal but can't seem to find the time or motivation anymore.
13. I love doing laundry and organizing my closet.
14. I hate putting laundry away.
15. I obsess over maps whenever we go on a roadtrip. Having said that, the first time Seth and I drove to NYC, we left the road map in IN and figured, how hard can it be? It's the biggest city in the country! We eventually made it, but were very confused at one point, as to why we were in NJ.
16. I've worn the same perfume for over 10 years.
17. I have curly hair, but blow dry it straight almost every day.
18. I don't like tea; I think it's fake coffee.
19. I was very gullible as a child and believed my friend (in fifth grade) who told me she auditioned to be Daisy Duke, but turned down their offer. I also believed my friend who told me she was John Travolta's daughter, but he gave her away for his career.
20. I am extremely sentimental.
21. I went to my friend Lindsay's birthday party and everyone was giving her clothes and journals and nice stuff. I got her a magnet and felt like the scum of the earth. Now we give each other magnets each year.
22. My mom used to make me Chip Beef Gravy on Toast whenever dad was out of town. It's still my favorite comfort food.
23. I just read the Starbridge Series by Susan Howatch and could read them all again and again.
24. I am a rut person. I love my ruts. I need my ruts.
25. I fear that the exhaustion and isolation of having two small children, and the resultant lack of "reaching out" is going to render me friendless by the time i'm through this phase of life. Seriously.

Proud Mama

2009-01-20T22:27:00.004-06:00

We bundled up and took the boys to Chinatown on Monday morning for a dim sum-ish treat. Brice is a big fan of rice and ginger sauteed whitefish, so we figured there'd be something he'd like. Let me tell you, when the child started throwing back fried turnip cakes and feeding himself soy sauce-spiked congee, I could not have been more proud. He even fed himself with the proper spoon. Hand me a tissue. The child cannot talk much nor can he follow a basic command without having an ugly meltdown, but when he embraces non-mainstream Chinese food and asks for more, well, he might as well be holding a violin and taking requests. The kid did me proud.
Even Harry got in on the act. He always stares at me when I eat and opens his mouth as I put the spoon in my own mouth. Then he wimpers and starts to smile again as I dip my fork or spoon back into whatever i'm eating. The poor kid!!! Brice couldn't eat solids without gagging and throwing up until he was 14 months old, so we're not exactly sure when to toss Harry his first cracker. But that morning in Chinatown, with Brice stuffing his face and Harry staring at me with mournful eyes, I broke. I gave him congee. And he LOVED it.

Question

2009-01-13T13:34:00.001-06:00

When you want to blog about a book you've read recently, how do you post a picture of the book? I don't find Blogspot's "help" very helpful in figuring this out. I've not idea how to post a picture of anything other than something from my camera.

Word of the year

2009-01-04T23:04:00.002-06:00

I was reading my friend Robyn's blog. She was writing that instead of making resolutions for the year, she chose a word for the year. Brilliant! I had resolved to make my bed each day, and promptly dropped the ball on January 1st. Rats. So, being a word person myself, i'm going to copy her. I'm going to choose a word. And my word is...refresh. It's been a crappy year, with a few brilliant exceptions. It's been, even the great parts, really draining. But i'm hopeful.

Don't listen to a word I say.

2009-01-04T22:26:00.002-06:00

Those were my instructions to Seth when Harry was born. Don't believe a word I say. I knew once the hormones started going haywire and life with two got crazier and crazier, I would become a little, shall we say, erratic. I told him, "if I tell you we need to put one or both of them up for adoption, don't listen to me. If I tell you I HAVE to have another one right away, definitely don't listen to me. In fact, go sleep on the couch." It's that crazy time again--Cute Baby Time. It's the six month mark. Fat baby, fat thighs, lots of smiles and interaction. It's the time when I think "oh, this CAN'T be my last time going through this. I HAVE to have another fat baby. I have to watch another one come alive and laugh and sparkle and interact and smile when he sees me." It's dangerous territory. Especially when said child is still not sleeping through the night (not even close, really). I mentioned something to Seth tonight about how great it would be to maybe have just one more. He happily reminded me that the only things i'm allowed to have a say in are what's for dinner and what he's wearing. Thank you, Seth.

Happy Half-Birthday, little man!!!

2008-12-31T14:11:00.003-06:00

Our little guy is growing up! Harrison is 6 months old, as of yesterday. After a rocky start, he's turned into the sweetest, happiest little guy. He's got a big smile and even bigger thighs. Love that!! Happy half-birthday, little man. Here's to many more!!!

He's got his father's eyes and his mother's gag reflex

2008-12-27T15:17:00.002-06:00

Poor Brice. He wanted to help feed Harry, and we wanted to encourage any non-violent gesture on his part. I handed him the spoon and just as he gently laid the spoon in Harry's mouth, his eyes started to water and those all too familiar pre-barf convulsions started. Seth cleaned him up and he came over and wanted another try. (Why we allowed this, I still cannot tell you.) He didn't even make it to Harry's mouth this time. He walked over to Harry and immediately threw up. In one of my "mother of the year" moments, I shoved Brice back so he actually fell on his bottom while throwing up. (To stop him from throwing up on Harry's face; hey, I had to make a "which is worse?" decision quickly!!) After Seth cleaned him up, we still weren't sure what the trigger was, so we just handed him the bowl of completely non-offensive oatmeal. Bingo. Brice immediately started gagging. Poor kid!! He's a kindred soul!! I heaved and gagged my way through the first 9 months of diapering Brice. Now, we have to try and keep Brice occupied when I feed Harry, as he'll started gagging if he even sees Harry in the high chair. Hopefully this is just a phase (but probably not).

I'm tired.

2008-12-18T21:42:00.002-06:00

So very very tired. I'm tired of Seth working 60+ hours week after week after week. I cannot remember the last time he came home before the kids went down. I'm tired of not eating together. I'm tired of having to share him with his office at least part, and usually a large part, of every weekend. I'm tired of Brice. I'm tired of fighting with him. I'm tired of him hitting and scratching and biting and throwing a tantrum all day. I'm tired of him screaming when he gets disciplined. or when I hold Harry. or when I say no. or just to get attention. i'm tired of not being able to go outside without carrying two children down the stairs. i'm tired of not being able to go outside without at least one of them screaming on the way down, and both of them screaming by the time we all get in the car or get the stroller set up. i'm tired of carrying two children UP the stairs while Brice throws a tantrum. i'm tired of doing everything by myself. i'm tired of going to bed by myself. i'm tired of wondering when all this will end and there will be peace and balance in our house again. i'm tired of not sleeping through the night. i'm tired of dreading the sound of waking children in the morning. i'm tired of hearing, "baby, i really need to get into work early in the morning." i'm tired of being tired. i'm tired of not being able to hang out with my friends. or go to church. or go to housegroup. or being able to relax with a book. i'm tired of not feeling like myself. i miss me. and God. and Seth.

Oh no she didn't!!!

2008-12-15T15:02:00.002-06:00

Today I took Brice and Harry to Fantasy Kingdom, an indoor play area in Chicago. They have lots of toys, dress up areas, trains, play cars, etc. And they have slides. Two pretty big ones. And you have to climb up a castle to get there. Brice, of course, was fascinated. He's a bit new to the whole slide thing. He's gone down the one at the park a few times. But usually Seth is at the top to help him, and i'm waiting at the bottom so he doesn't go flying off and smash his head on the ground. Today Brice climbed to the top of the castle by himself (well done, son). I figured since I could only be in one place at a time, I should be at the bottom. Well, I got down there and Brice was peeking his head down at me and giggling. A little scared to take the plunge, I think. He did this for about 30 seconds, then I heard a girl say "Go!!" and she shoved him down the slide. The poor kid came careening down the slide in ball, since he'd been crouching at the top when this pig-tailed monster set him flying. Thankfully I was at the bottom to catch him, but he still smacked his forehead on the slide.

I cannot fully describe the anger and rage that rose up in me at this little girl. I was FURIOUS. I yelled at her up the slide and a couple mothers came running to see if it was their daughter. Shockingly, her mother wasn't one of the ones who came to see if it was her daughter. Big surprise. I know I should hold it together better. I know she's just a kid, too. But it's more than anger at badly-behaved children. It's a desire/compulsion to protect Brice from the harshness and cruelty of other children. I know I can't do this forever. And I shouldn't. I should be there to hug him after he falls, not to make sure he never falls. But as yet it's just been him and me. He's just getting to that age when kids are going to start ripping things out of his hand, shove him over, be mean, etc. We're considering signing him up for preschool a couple mornings a week. And it's this issue that's giving me pause. I'm afraid. Afraid of him smiling at a kid and the kid sneering back at him. Afraid of him playing with something only to have it ripped out of his hand. I want to protect him from that. I want to protect him from that far more than I want to protect him from falling or getting sick or, whatever. I'd much rather he breaks a leg playing with a friend than gets his spirit broken while playing with a "friend." Dang. This is when it gets hard, isn't it? It's exhausting to chase him around and make sure he doesn't get hurt here. But it's crushing to let him go and trust God to care for him in all the ways I can't.

What to do, what to do...

2008-12-08T20:16:00.003-06:00

Here is my dilemma, one faced by pretty much every other parent, I think: what do you do when you have a new(ish) baby who is napping twice a day and a toddler who naps once a day?? Now that the baby is becoming somewhat regular, they tag team their naps and it isn't until 4 or even 5pm that they both are done napping. So, does the baby get robbed of his two naps in order to just roll with the toddler schedule, or do you honor the baby's need to sleep and you and the toddler are stuck in the small, second floor condo all the livelong day? The weather in Chicago is turning brutish so it's not great weather to go out in anyway, but it'd be nice to have the option. So, parents of two little ones, or parents of one who have a second coming (that's you Mike!), what do you do???

The Christmas card picture that wasn't

2008-11-25T13:30:00.002-06:00

Last year when I sent out our Christmas card, Seth commented that it looked like we were getting divorced. There were no pictures of us all together. So this year when I was looking for a family picture, I realized that again we had managed to avoid the family picture. This is in large part due to the fact I have not had clean hair AND been wearing make up in the 5 months since Harrison was born. So, this past Sunday we made sure everyone was clean and dressed (no small feat, yo!) and we tried to get the picture that would land on the Christmas card. We didn't get it.

First of all, let me just say it's not so easy to take a self-portrait and get everyone centered. Look at Brice--can you tell the TV is on??

Brice was trying to get away and I think Seth was lying on Harry's arm. Poor kid.

Why am I the only one smiling? I think Brice is, but he didn't manage to get his whole face in the picture.

I love the expression on Harry's face. I was tempted to use this shot.

So, maybe next year we'll get it together.

Hey Mikey, it worked!!!

2008-11-22T13:27:00.003-06:00

Well wonders never cease. I gave him a time out and he sat there. And hated it. It was beautiful. I received some great advice from you parents of toddlers and decided to give this whole "time out" thing a couple more tries. No more time outs in his toy/book-stuffed room. And i'm not yet doing the "1-2-3" pre-time out warning. I'm trying not to jump the gun or be harsh, but when he's doing stuff he KNOWS is wrong (screaming, hitting, throwing food/toys/tantrums) i'll calmly say, "you need a time out" and set him on an adult chair. I was a bit worried that he'd fall off and break his neck, but so far he's not nose-dived or tried to escape. The first time I did this, I sat him on the chair and turned around. When I got to the kitchen, he was still sitting on it, looking at me with a worried expression. I about fell over. I fully expected him to jump off and throw himself into a full-blown tantrum. But he just sat there. Then he protested and made the sign for "help me." When I ignored that he went into full-on charm mode. Looked at me and gave me his biggest smile, then erupted into hysterical laughter. I remain stonefaced (serious willpower). He then threw his head back and howled. At that point the kitchen timer went off and I pulled him down. Amazing.

The kids and the folks

2008-11-18T14:52:00.004-06:00

Harry checking out the exersaucer (while wearing Brice's fancy hat).

Harry playing around with Seth.

The boys trying to squeeze in a few extra minutes of sleep.

Brice and Gramma Pat reading the "ho ho ho" book.

Brice and papa watching Blue's Clues. or football.

1-2-3 (not so) Magic

2008-11-18T14:19:00.002-06:00

In our never-ending search for the perfect book on discipline, I picked up a copy of 1-2-3 Magic. The basic premise (which both Seth and I had previously disdained) was that when your kid is acting obnoxious you "count them." Give them 3 chances to behave, then give them a time-out. So, when Brice was throwing his food, I counted him. I said "one" and he smiled and held up his finger (he just learned he is one year old). When I said "two" he sort of looked at me wearily and threw his orange piece. So I said "three, time out!". He stuck two goldfish in his mouth, held up his hands so I could clean them, then I cleaned him off and took him to his room (which the book suggests). I set him down in his room and he ran to his toys. I called after him, "this is your time out for throwing your food. I'll come get you in two minutes." I came back and opened the door and he smiled at me and handed me two books. Oh yeah, this time out thing is totally going to work. I think we'll have to rethink this.

You mothers of toddlers--what do you do to discipline your kids???

WAC and me

2008-11-12T14:40:00.002-06:00

WAC is the abbreviation for West Loop Athletic Club. I have a love/hate relationship with this gym. I love that it has excellent childcare. I hate to exercise. They have no coffee bar or massage parlor on site, so I am forced to pretend to exercise. Luckily, they have those fancy treadmills with cable tv attached to them. I can walk at a snail's pace AND watch E! True Hollywood Story. Love that. Then, if they're not hunting me down, telling me that Harry needs to feed (just b/c he's raging does not mean he's hungry. But try telling that to frazzled, underpaid childcare providers), I slip back in the locker room for a shower. A real shower!!!! I don't think I "work out" often or hard enough to actually burn any calories, but I continue to go. The real workout is getting the kids dressed, down the stairs, into the car, then back. I swear I burn ten times as many calories doing this part. But I love walking into a place that smells like chlorine, greeted by people who pretend to know me and are glad to see me. I then drop the kiddos off and callously turn on my heels while they wail and protest and pretend to miss me. Who would have thought having children would force me to consider "working out" to be "me time"? Doesn't matter. All I know is that I get to go the bathroom without negotiating who gets to flush and how many times, and I get to shower without straining to hear who's crying. Oh, and I get to hear about how Mary Kate and Ashley were bazillionaires by the time they were ten. Good stuff.

What just happened???

2008-11-11T15:31:00.002-06:00

A while back, I blogged about how Harry was becoming a big boy--no more crying, sleeping in his pack and play, etc. Let me now amend my praise. Apparently we messed with something we shouldn't have by putting Harry on his back to sleep, instead of in his carseat. He has not slept through the night since. He started sleeping through the night at 4 weeks. First 8 hours, then 10, then 11. Then we put him in his pack and play. He started getting up once, then twice, sometimes three times. Those were the good days. Now he goes down around 7pm, sleeps for 3 hours, then gets up to feed. Then he wakes up every hour and half until 6 or 7am. What happened??? I know these aren't all hunger feeds, and we should probably let him CIO. The problem with that is that he sleeps in our bathroom. We'd be up all night. Not that we're not already. But at least we get some sleep. Harry can't go in Brice's room until he sleeps through the night, but at this point, when will that be????

Fun with Photo Booth

2008-11-04T19:01:00.004-06:00

Where's your nose??

Where are your eyes??

Where are your ears??

Where's your tongue??

Say taco!! (his new favorite word)

I have seen the enemy

2008-10-26T20:16:00.003-05:00

And he is red. And ticklish. That's right, it's Elmo. My child is addicted to Elmo.
It all started innocently enough--a shirt with Elmo on it; a Sesame Street book. Then I made the fatal mistake--I rented an Elmo video. I might as well have fed him crack. I just figured I could let him watch a short video during the time I got Harry up and changed and fed. Makes sense, right? But it backfired on me. I thought it would give me a little peace and quiet and keep Brice busy so he wouldn't feel ignored and jealous. But the child wants to watch Elmo ALL THE TIME now. "Elmo, Elmo, Elmo, Elmo." He doesn't say "mama" or "dada," but he says "Elmo."
So, this past week we decided to just go cold turkey. We put away the video and have not played it once. He stills asks for him all day long. He occasionally throws tantrums and cries and yells out for him. He brings me the remote and points to the TV. Poor kid. I really thought I could let him watch a little bit and that would satisfy him. Who knew?

We saw it coming

2008-10-19T22:18:00.002-05:00

This afternoon we put the boys down for a nap. Harry sleeping? Check! Brice? Not so much. He was talking and yelling and jumping up and down, but Seth ignored his pleas and hopped in the shower. I took off on errands. After Seth got out, he peeked in Brice's room and saw a flash of movement as Brice dove into the corner of his crib to pretend he was sleeping. That's not so unusual. What Seth saw when he leaned in was: Brice was naked from the waist down.
Uh-Oh
Seth quickly prioritized while assessing the situation. There can be only one reason Brice would disrobe. That's right. A #2. Seth got Brice up, re-diapered him, put him in a zip up onesie then pulled the crib away from the wall to find missing diaper and pj bottoms. Seems Brice took off his diaper and bottom and shoved them under his bumper and against the wall. Mercifully, he's been having little pellet, rabbit-like poos. So, it wasn't too difficult or disgusting to clean up. But still, it's kinda foul, don't you think?

Oh, the marathon!!!

2008-10-15T22:18:00.003-05:00

I love love love the Chicago marathon. I'm not a runner, but there is nothing more moving to me than watching people run a marathon. I started going years back when my friend Rhessa ran her first. I got up early, took the el downtown, got a venti something or other from Starbucks, and elbowed my way to the fence near the finish line. Then I stood there and cried for two hours. I thought I was going to cheer her on, which I did. But I wasn't at all prepared for the emotion that swept over me--again and again--as I watched people run the last stretch of the marathon. Runners were laughing, crying, walking, limping. Even falling down. And then someone else, who didn't appear to know them, would stop running, give up their time, and help the person up, then accompany them to the finish line. I know i'm sentimental, but does it get any better than that?
This past Sunday was the marathon. The halfway point was half a block from our place, so we loaded up the boys and headed over. There were (before these pics were taken) tons of folks lined up, cheering, holding signs, ringing cow bells (love that). The cops that were there to provide security were clapping and yelling and cheering everyone on. Seth and I stood and watched and yelled. Brice clapped and waved and even got to give a high five to one of the runners. Harry was calm and happy and sucked on the Bjorn for an hour. Everytime I watch a marathon, I always entertain the thought of running, say, a 5k. Maybe this will be the year!!

Colic (and family) Update

2008-10-14T13:41:00.004-05:00

I think it's over. I really do. It's been lessening the past week and haven't had any raging for the past few days. Ahhh.... AND, he's no longer sleeping in his carseat. He's a big boy now, sleeping in his pack and play (inside his changing pad; keeps him cozy). He's still swaddled, but that's not a big deal. We can even put him down drowsy and he'll fall asleep. This may not seem like a big deal, but believe me. It is. Today, he's napping on a schedule. Wow.
I originally started this blog thinking it would be primarily a place to keep family updated on the boys. And it is. But I also thought i'd write about what was going on with ME and SETH. What we were doing, thinking, eating, reading. It's not that i've not had the time, it's that we've not done anything for the past four months. We've gone out to eat once without the boys (thanks Christa!!). I've not read a single book. I've cooked, like, three meals. I've cried 5 out of 7 days a week. We've not been back to housegroup yet. We have started back to church. But that's it, really. If we'd known how HARD this would have been, and we could have gotten a guarantee we'd still have Harry, we would have waited to have the second. Brice is a strong-willed child who did not take well to sharing me. We've been negotiating tantrums, flailing about trying to discipline him in ways that would not break his spirit, all while listening to Harry rage in the background. It's been a hard four months. But I think things are turning. I do. I feel it. Brice isn't changing; he's becoming harder, in fact. But I have more energy for him now. More patience. And Harry is getting so much easier (and quieter!!). I think we made it.

CIO, baby, CIO

2008-10-07T14:44:00.002-05:00

If you know what CIO means, you feel my pain. CIO is short hand for "cry it out" a much maligned version of sleep training--you know, when you teach your baby to fall asleep without being fed, bounced, rocked, etc. Basically, you get the child all gussied up for bed, fed, kissed and then set him down and wave good bye. I've heard parents say that this version rips their hearts out. I suggest they move further away from the door. Kidding. But seriously. We waited until Brice was four months old to start with him and he took to it like a dream. He slept in his bassinet instead of his carseat. A few days of crying and he was out. He was on a regular schedule immediately, didn't need to be swaddled; he turned into a dream child. It also coincided with his colic ending. Needless to say, the sun rose on my world right around four months.
We are nearing the four month mark with Harry. I planned on waiting until four months to start sleep training, but I sense i'll be moving it up. Mainly b/c my back cannot take the endless bending over, picking up the car seat, bouncing the car seat, bending over to swaddle, etc. I've been trying to get him to sleep for the past two hours. Four times i've had to go in, get him, feed him, rewrap him, bounce him, and do it again. Oi!!! So he started screaming AGAIN and I left him. I just let him cry. There must be a reason they don't have memories that go this far back. And miraculously, he fell asleep. This is good. Naps are the hardest to manage. Oh, this is good. I'll keep you posted. But for now, my new mantra is: CIO baby!! ( mommy loves you)

Major 'tude

2008-09-23T20:20:00.004-05:00

The boy has always been strong-willed. I knew that within the first few weeks. But lately, he's developing a bit of a 'tude. And temper. Oh my gosh. It's hard to capture in words, but, oh, what the heck. I'll give it a shot. Ornery. Foul. Vindictive. You can't even look sideways at the kid without getting a nasty scowl from him, and usually he'll reach out and swat you just to get his point across. Charming. It'd be kind of funny if it wasn't so exhausting and maddening. We're disciplining him only to stay in the game. We've given up on the idea that it will actually change his behavior. Disciplining him just ticks him off and makes him up his game. It doesn't actually change his behavior. Brice entered the terrible twos around 11 months. I remember trying to redirect him and he scowled at me and tried to hit me. I called my mom and asked if it was too early for him to have a temper and she just laughed. Great. I hear things start to even out around three years old. So, we're halfway to normal. Wish us luck!!

Smiling and sitting up (sorta)

2008-09-16T23:03:00.001-05:00